"Has anyone seen Brown-paper Jake?"
One of the cowboys has a think and then asks, "What's he look like?"
Sheriff replies, "Well he wears a brown paper hat, a brown paper waistcoat, a brown paper shirt, brown paper boots, brown paper pants, and a brown paper jacket."
"So what's he wanted for?" asks the same cowboy.
"Rustlin'..." replies the Sheriff.
Anon.
Help...help...
Man falls into the lake while boating on the Serpentine. He shouts for help but no one hears him. Then a man walking his dog sees him and stops by the lake side. The drowning man sees him and shouts even louder, "Help, help. I can't swim!" The man hears him and shouts back, "I can't play the piano but you don't hear me shouting about it!"
Anon.
Blonde on blonde...
A blonde woman driver was speeding down the road in her little red sports car when she was pulled over by a blonde woman police officer.
When the blonde officer asks to see the blonde driver's licence, she starts to rummage through her purse hurriedly. The blonde officer sees the blonde driver getting progressively more agitated and asks, "Mam, do you know what you are looking for? "No, officer. Can you give me a little clue? The blonde officer takes pity, "It's square and it has your picture on it."
The blonde driver has another rummage, finds a square mirror, looks at it and hands it to the police officer.
The blonde officer looks at the mirror, then hands it back. "Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."
Anon.
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